I go through this all the time. Sometimes, there’s people around to notice. That makes it hard because you tend to not focus on what you need to get done, but instead on how you look to those looking at you. Mind you, they don’t really know what’s going on. They see part of the story and they always will because the whole story lies within you. If they care, and you care, maybe one day, you’ll sit down and tell them the whole story. Or maybe you won’t. Maybe they will only be interested in the first five minutes of it. Maybe they will get bored. Maybe they won’t care.
Yes, it could be any or all of the above. But the point here is not what they do, say, react to or feel. The point is that it is YOUR story and how you do, say, react and feel about it is far more important to your life than theirs.
There are times you feel that no matter how many times you pick yourself up, nothing is going to change. It might feel like change is upon you at first but then it goes back to where it was. This makes you doubt yourself. People looking in, may also cause you to doubt yourself.
At times like this, ask yourself :
1. Is the pain worth it?
2. Is the alternative what you can bear?
3. Is there a good enough reason why you are putting yourself through this?
If you ask yourself the right questions, you will get the answers you seek.
Get it wrong. Start again. Best not to look at this as a ‘three strikes, you’re out’ kind of rule. The aim is to get there, no matter how long it takes. But only if you want to.